PROPER PROTOCOL FOR HANDLING PRESS CONFERENCES

What the hey? Not that any of you avid readers will ever encounter this intractable problem, I nevertheless supply it for that inopportune moment when you find yourself at a temporary loss for words. As an important mentor instructed me once during the war geographical argument over certain territories in Southeast Asia “If you can’t impress them with your intelligence on the matter, baffle them with your illuminative bullshit”. Herewith, I submit same. 

Premier Kim Jong-Un announced he would personally be giving a news conference discussing North Korea’s imminent landing of a man on the sun within the next several years. After his initial announcement on the subject, many reporters raised their hands with questions for the Premier.


One rude reporter shouted out, “Rubbish. The sun is thousands of degrees Celsius. No one can even get within 10 million miles of the orb! How do your propose to do so?”
 
The audience was stunned with the reporter’s brazen query and the room fell into a long silence. Jong-Un, unruffled in the least by the outburst, declared in even tones “We will land at night.”

The gathering and everyone in North Korea watching on television broke into thunderous applause at his rejoinder.

 

Back in Washington D.C., Nancy Pelosi and her staff were watching the news conference. Upon hearing Jong-Un’s remarks  about the sun landing, Pelosi sneered, “What a complete idiot – everybody knows there’s no sun at night.”

 

Her staff broke into thunderous applause at this tidbit of insight.

In the immortal words on one Forest Gump, a noted philosopher- “Stupid is as stupid does.”

And that is all I’m gonna say about that.

Posted in Humor, KP Veterans, VA Agents | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Potassium conundrum

My old Marine has been undergoing various tests to determine the cause (s) of his current gut problems; no answers yet.  Along the way, he has been warned about recent high blood pressure spikes and kidney function problems which include high potassium (hyperkalemia).  His last potassium reading was high enough to be told to go the ER to get checked out; his other  tests were mainly okay.  Why the insistence on a trip the ER? It turns out that too much potassium can slow or stop hearts.  These facts, and the words “acute and chronic kidney failure” on his problem list have our attention.

The only dietary advice he received was to cut out foods like bananas so I’ve had to analyse and change our menus by consulting online renal diets from authorities.

The VA’s Kidney eClinic website (LINK) provides basic information with a focus on DMII and high blood pressure and self-care.

Click screenshot to go to this site.

The site states that VA issues BP cuff by request.  Within a few days, he received a really good cuff.  An unpleasant thing about all of this is that his kidney numbers haven’t been too good for quite awhile but his PC docs didn’t deliver the bad news–VA or non-VA doctors–even though he has DMII.

Image from VA-issued blood pressure cuff.

Our “Mediterranean” diet no longer controls his DMII either.  Someone is cranky about all the new dietary restrictions to add to the old ones but adaptation is essential as we age.

I used to think of food ingredients as, well, food.  Something comforting and good like mashed potatoes.  Now I think of it as chemical compounds we ingest–beware.  Cooking potatoes, if at all, is a whole new experience.  Blah….

Kiedove

 

Posted in Agent Orange, All about Veterans, Food for thought, General Messages, Guest authors, non-va care, Tips and Tricks, Uncategorized, VA Health Care, Vietnam Disease Issues | Tagged , | 5 Comments

CAVC–#18-1009- YOU’VE GOT TO BRING BACK THAT LOVIN’ FEELIN’

Wowser. Old Butch asked me since bein’s how the Seattle Puzzle Palace refused to do his claim when they promised to, if we could fun them right back and slap ’em upside the head with another Writ of Mandamus for Breach of Contract. I said sure, why not? I’m not going to put my name on this. No need to. Turns out Butch is quite the experienced English major.  So “Butch”wrote this one up to see if the CAVC Judge didn’t cotton to perjury.

Redacted Writ

Well, boy howdy is the Honorable Judge not only a little miffed at getting dissed barely six months into his new job. Lands but he took two pages to say he wants some fairly firm answers in 14 days and 13 nights. That would be about the 19th of March or the end of Spring NOVA if I read my calendar right. Shooo, doggies. Maybe I should tell them fellers down at the Regional Office that Butch (and I) are going to be incommunicado from the 15th to the 19th. They seem to lack a telephone number for him. Mine will probably go onto the answering service for that period. I anticipate a high call volume in order to quench the good Judge’s anger. Bummer dude. No answer…

Cupcake and I are flying down instead of driving because we have a horse who’s a week post-surgery and he needs to be supervised. Kona can peel a bandage off under a sleazy as quick as you can say Jack Robinson.

In most cases, and my current one for my third stab at an Ex Writ for my greenhouse is a fairly representative example, a CAVC Judge will allow 30 days for a nuanced discussion on what the Secretary has to say or apologize for. Hell, sometimes they (VA) even ask for another two weeks on top of it-and the Court grants it. Even if the excuse for delay is flagrant, flatulent and flimsy but still accomplished what was deficient, the Secretary will get a bye in spite of the delay.

18-938 Order -30 days 3-1-18

But…. when you blow off the Judge and the Butchmeister’s suspense date of January 28th by a month (and still counting), with no date of a decision given or even contemplated on the horizon, well then, you get what the Court likes to call  the double secret extra extraspeshull treatment…

Accordingly, it is
ORDERED that within 14 days of the date of this order, counsel for the Secretary provide the Court with the information described above. It is further

ORDERED that the Court will not entertain any motion for an extension of time with respect to the Secretary’s response to this order.

Remember when you were back in ‘Nam and some FNG next to you cut loose on auto and forgot to remove those 3 tracers at the end of the mag? Remember how the ground and the trees around you positively seemed to come alive with all that incoming 7.62 a few seconds later? Well, try telling the Court you’ll have this sorted in 90 days and then come back and laugh and tell them how you were just funnin’ them. It’s about the same. The incoming is going to be a shitstorm of sanctions unless -hell, there ain’t no ‘unless’ this time. I smell blood in the water.

Document

Posted in Extraordinary Writs of Mandamus, Humor, KP Veterans, Tips and Tricks, VA Agents | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

HADIT.COM RADIO SHOW–ALL ABOUT VBMS AND CMAs

Boy howdy did life get a whole lot finer in a week. It’s not perfect but my Change Management Agent (CMA) at the Seattle VA Regional Office is a real go-getter. She had been in the CMA saddle all of three days when I met her Tuesday. She subtly indicated she doesn’t always agree with what happens in Appeals. I sure hope she takes a shine to CMAing. With VBMS access and a real whippersnapper CMA, you can move mountains in short order at your local Fort Fumble.

Tina is the wife of a lifer (Army Tanker) and loves this job. She intimated she doesn’t always agree with everything that happens about VA claims adjudication but hooooweeee who does? You won’t get a 3-page dissertation on that subject from me. Maybe a fifteen pager but not a trey.

No VA Bozos

Jerrel has graciously asked me to come on and discuss the latest war stories from Puzzle Palaces across our soon to be fruited plains. Call in and remind me to tell you about the one from Phoenix with 3 glossy 8 1/2 X 11 photos of about 1/10 of a gram of Marijuana vacuumed from 18 pockets of a Vet’s fatigues, jacket and shirt to bust him and give him a bum discharge. Remember, these were introduced into the Vet’s VBMS file five days after the rating was in the “ready for notification” stage. He was already at SMC M and 5-year protected. VA decided to go fishing to see if they could rustle up some Willful Misconduct. I don’t reckon most Vets realize it but the VA is not allowed to depart the reservation and collect negative evidence. That’s a Bozo No-No in 58 VAROs.

Anyway, join us on Monday evening, March 5th, in the year of our Father Howard 2018. The show begins at 1600 HRS local here on the Left Coast or, adding three hours, at 1900 HRS on the (L)eastern seaboard. The call-in number remains

347-237-4819 plus the number 1

Press the number one (1, nung, môt, un) to talk live with us.

 

Posted in All about Veterans, Humor, Inspirational Veterans, KP Veterans, Lawyering Up, VA Agents, vA news, VBMS Tricks, Veterans Law | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

CAVC–#18-938–SHARPENING UP THE PUNJI STICKS

I reckon you folks don’t know this but Cupcake was laboring under the delusion that I was never going to see my elusive 20’X28′ greenhouse and “other valuable considerations”. I took that bet and it appears she may have to do dishes for the rest of her life. If this Order doesn’t produce a grant of Mandamus with the potential for sanctions, I’m gonna come down with a bad chronic case of dishpan hands directly in about 35 days. The suspense is killing me.  

I’m gonna let them gomers in Seattle know up front (because it appears they have assigned a minder to read my blatherings) that when this comes back down and we have to actually sign on the dotted line, I’m going to invoke Karnas v. Derwinski and insist on the older M 28 regulations versus the newer M28 R version. This little ploy will cost them 3 years of propane rather than the 3 months they steadfastly refused to increase on. The reason is buried way down in Chapter 9. The new M 28 R says you have to prove you can financially sustain your IILP after it’s up and running X months or years. The old M 28 says no such hooey. It says they’ll supply whatever you need to make it a huge success. If I keep that greenhouse cooking at 75° all winter, I could blow a huge sum on propane annually. The cost difference to VA would be up in the five digits if I turn it into a hothouse.  As we say in VAland, Karnas is a bitch.

Our old friend  Karnas vDerwinski, 1 Vet. App. 308, 313 (1991) ( reversed on other grounds) and replaced by  Kuzma v. Principi, 341 F.3d 1327, 1328-29 (Fed. Cir. 2003) taught us that the rules when you start this poker game will remain the same. If you change them, the version most beneficial to the Vet will be employed-not the other way around. In any case, the Vet gets to choose whichever version he prefers. Some folks are contraries and work against themselves but that’s a story for another day.

The ILPmobile Hi Ho Hi Ho, it’s off to bars we go

I began my oddysey the day Bruce Almighty called from Georgia and asked if I’d put in for ILP or was just going to shuck, jive and write about it on asknod.   May 11th, 2011 was the day I showed up at the VR&E Corral. That set the time clock for which manual to employ. The newer, more restrictive M 28 R (forbidding riding lawnmowers and other mobility devices you can drive to the VFW bar on) was revised the day before my birthday (April Fools) in 2014. VA recognizes May 11th, 2011 as the date of “request for grant” but then – they don’t even call an ILP greenhouse an “entitlement” such as how Phil Cushman had to explain to the Fed Circus what entitlement really was. That VA brain fart of remodeling Phil’s VISTA Medical records blossomed into Due Process as we now know it.

Once the fat lady (VLJ) sings greenhouse or woodworking shop (or ______ ________), that’s all she wrote, ladies and gentlemen. That greenhouse has now become an entitlement due and owing-let no Bozo rend it asunder.  St. Margaret of the Holy Order Of the Sisters of Indiana Ave. NW has now asked for the particulars of the “shrinkage”from Dr. Shulkin. The good doctor will be granted 30 days and 29 nights in which to unravel this Gordian knot and explain who will walk the plank. The odds at Bally’s Reno Sports Book has Emerald Downs’ first claiming race this winter with VRE Officer 9/4 in the pole position.  A Sanction is running at 2/1  in gate #3. Wimbledon Getaway is going off at 80-1.

18-938 Order -30 days 3-1-18

As usual, this will be fun to watch. Be on the lookout for post hoc rationalizations and misconstrual of what 20 X 28 means in VA math using 38 CFR §4.25 addition. Hell, that might not be too far from the truth come to think of it. Remember, these VA folks  just invent it as they go. We may eventually find out what the meaning of “is” is.

And here are the Solze Notices we all have to file when something comes up. VA’s timing is abominable.

Solze #1 

Solze #2

Posted in Extraordinary Writs of Mandamus, Independent Living Program, KP Veterans, Tips and Tricks, VA Agents, Veterans Law | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

BVA–12/29/2017 PURE JETGUN WIN FOR HEP C

Two nexus letters are a powerful pair to draw to. The VA Examiner came up short because their own M-21 1MR says it very clearly in Part III, Subpart iv. 4.1.2e. We’re coming into a new world of Veterans Law Judges (VLJs) who are free thinkers. What was once an impossibility in 1992 is not so impossible now.

Check out VLJ Jonathan B. Kramer’s handiwork. Besides, any pair beats Ace high in VA poker. https://www.va.gov/vetapp17/files9/1760765.txt

An IPA and some barbecue-flavored chips go well with this one. Johnny Vet didn’t win this at the able hands of the DAV  in Houston. No way, doggies. I expect he’s been reading a lot of asknod and hadit.com.

Or… how about this one. One positive nexus letter (private) versus one negative nexus letter generated by a VA examiner= equipoise and you win. Just make sure your nexus letter is probative and discusses all modes of transmission.

https://www.va.gov/vetapp17/files8/1752964.txt

 

Posted in BvA HCV decisions, Jetgun BvA Decisions, Jetgun Claims evidence, Nexus Information, Tips and Tricks, VA Medical Mysteries Explained, Veterans Law | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

A DAUGHTER’S LOVE…

Here’s a wonderful vignette to greet Sunday with, folks. Some of us were lucky to have a daughter and enjoy their undying worship of us. My only observation is that this ol’ boy’s wife must have really been pissed to get even with him like this. The things we do for love…

Posted in Humor, KP Veterans, VA Agents | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

VBMS–THE MAGICAL MYSTERY TOUR

asknod@va.gov

Yeppers, folks. I’ve been busy testing and criminal background investigating and PIV carding. I’ve  finally been given the keys to the VBMS henhouse to view my clients’ claims in real time across our Fruited Plains. Seems there are still a few purple mountains blocking the important access into Citrix RO-5 VBMS. That’s where the gold is but no dice. I’m promised access in the “AM” on Monday morning. I guess it’s like waiting for the cable guy on an 8 AM to 12-ish window. You hope he ain’t funning you.

They promise to call back though. Hey , relax folks. “They” are private IT “vendors” that fix VA’s poor tired computer woes because VA has none (VA Geek Squads). These guys actually answer the phone. Yeah. Get out of here-right?

With this access comes my asknod@va.gov email as well. Most everything in the inbox is public relations crap and how absolutely wonderful the VA is to Vets. I didn’t check the whole list but I think they keep you posted on the various happy hours at the VSOs in your locale and what the best drink specials are each month (i.e. Hawaiian, Jamaican, Mardi Gras themes etc.)

I began back in July 2017 and sent in all the info and a request to Cheeseville for acceptance into the Loyal Order of the PIV. Last summer, one of my padewans learned the art of silently walking on rice paper too and became a VA Agent. She breezed right through the process and is now connected-in fact has been- for quite some time.  She got to dodge the TRIP training, too. She finally chided me in November and asked why I was still lollygagging around. Seems you have to call the Information SSecurity Officer (ISO) at your VSO and tell him you want in. I found out Cheeseville  apparently is not the repository for everything.

I must say it’s akin to building your own Light Sabre and finally feeling the Force within you.  Hoooooooooooooooooooooo doggies. Who in their right minds at VA would let me-us-of all people- into the bowels of their computer? Are they mad? In essence, we now have the ability to perform the fabled “VSO Motion For Reconsideration” if we catch it in the first 72 hours (the Golden Window) before it sets up like concrete. NOVA attorneys call that “Extreme Unction” because only VSOs are allowed by VA to perform the feat. Go figure. The blind leading the deaf…

Posted in All about Veterans, ASKNOD BOOK, KP Veterans, VA Agents, VBMS Tricks, Veterans Law | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments

SCHULKIN–SHOULD HE STAY OR SHOULD HE GO?

I’ll let you be the judge and the jury on this one. What do you do with a cabinet-level political appointee who breaks the law? Let’s put aside the sandbox politics and look at this as adults. You’re appointed to high position and voted in by Congress. You’re making about $400 K + with bennies as a senior SES. Somebody offers you some free tickets to Wimbledon and you know that’s a Bozo no-no. Further, it costs $4,312.00 dollars to take the wifesan (also a highly-paid MD) along.

 

Miz Vivieca

So what does the morally upstanding rich DINK (dual income no kids) decide? He lets a highly paid assistant pull a boner and try to cheat the okesan onto the entourage for free. When busted by some irate VA whistleblower for this idiocy, the assistant tries to back write the emails that show the illicit behaviour. Then when busted for that, Miz Vivieca tries to insinuate that the VA email system (password and PIV card-protected by CITRIX) has been hacked. Musta been some other body-no,no child it wasn’t me. Finally, acquiescing to the inevitability of her predicament, she retires to take the real story with her and be the fall guy for Dr Demento. I guess the biggest mystery is how the VAOIG caught wind of it and didn’t find it actionable in the first instance. But then, when was the last time you heard of VA’s OIG actually advocating for sanctions against any VA employee? What really rolls my socks down is that the whistleblower wasn’t tarred and feathered (yet).

The poll question is inevitable. Who believes this hooey? Should the Honorable Secretary fall on his sword and end this Kabuki theatre?  What does Joe Average Vet on the street say? If one of us lied and then admitted to it (in a round about way) we’d be out on the sidewalk in front of 810 Yellowbrick Road NW holding a cardboard box containing our desk paraphernalia faster than you could say Jack Robinson. Once again, we here at asknod trust you not to stuff the ballot box and will employ no cookies to block you.

Tell me what you all think.

Posted in Food for thought, Inspirational Veterans, KP Veterans, LOD and willful misconduct, VA Conspiracies, VA Secretaries, Veterans Law | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

A veteran-friendly law school in Florida + + +

The necessity for legal expertise and knowledge when dealing with the VA is by now obvious to readers of ASKNOD.  For veterans and others who are considering a law degree, the small Ave Maria School of Law (LINK) is somewhat unique.  An accredited orthodox Roman Catholic school, it has a devout, conservative and diverse student body.  Its unlikely conservative speakers will require physical protection from liberal protesters on their campus. 

pdf online flyer (LINK)

As Attorney Ben Krause (MN) has explained on his blog,  the VA will pay for law school under certain circumstances.  That’s how he became a lawyer working for veterans.

Ave Maria  (LINK) states that they work with the Post-9/11 GI bill, Yellow Ribbon program, Voc-Rehab, Montgomery GI Selected Reserve Bill, Reserve Education Assistant Program (REAP), the Survivor’s and Dependents’ Educational Assistance Program (DEA).  They offer family housing as well. 


Other cool offerings for everyone to take or audit

“Freshman Year for Free”–Modern States (LINK) online classes to earn CLEP and AP credits from top colleges.

AP = Advanced Placement; CLEP = College Level Examination Program

Many moons ago I took a 6-credit CLEP exam which applied towards my degree.  My husband took a history 3-credit CLEP exam and it was accepted by his college.  Saves time and money for motivated learners.


I wanted to get these hearts-for-vets by Vermont school children posted last week for V-Day but I had problems scanning.  There was a basket full of them at the Burlington VT VA-clinic that were too sweet to pass by.  After solving the tech issues, these cheery artworks are for us all to enjoy and are on our fridge now.  Thanks to the teachers and talented civic-minded kids.

Kiedove

Posted in All about Veterans, Food for the soul, Food for thought, Future Veterans, General Messages, Guest authors, Veterans Law | Tagged , | 3 Comments