They say the third time is the charm. Golly doggie, I’d hope to think so. Judge Bartley kinda got a little hot around the collar on my last foray to try to pour concrete around the  Individualized Independent Living Program (IILP)”plan” (CAVC # 17-1450). The way I read §21.92 is a normal progression of 1) plan (§21.92(a)); 2) approval of all stakeholders (§21.92(b))  and lastly 3) Implementation of said plan (§21.92(c). Seems it would be a shame to pour a pad for a 20′ X 28′ only show up with enough lumber to build a 15′ X 20′.

I built a daisy of a 3,800 SF 4 bedroom in the spring of 07 with individual baths and the blueprint  called out a rather dramatic 10/12 hip and ridge with enclosed soffits and Chinaman’s hats on the corners. The truss truck shows up with 4/12 Gable trusses. So who stepped on their necktie? Who cares? A little bit of communication keeps everyone on the same page. This is why I tried and tried to get those VR&E pukes to  write it up and keep everything “transparent” as they like to say down at the new Denver VAMC.

Back in April, 2016, my case manager showed up for the grand consummation of the IILP plan, whips out the old pen and the VAF 28-8872 and says sign here and we’re in business. I mean this old boy would have made a killer aluminum siding salesman. I ignored the urgently proffered pen and began to read. When I went back to Page one for a second BDA, he began to get ruffled and make inarticulate “throat” noises while he studied his fingernails. I couldn’t find any size for the greenhouse listed. I’d initially asked for a 24′ X 48′ in 6/12 pitch to grow those Jack and the Bean Stalk tomato trees in the middle. I figured that was a good ante to see what this poker game was for. I looked up and asked the big burning 800-lb. gorilla question-how big is this offer? Appeared that would be determined based on studying chicken entrails later on that night  after dey be casting dem bones, mon. I deferred, declined and said I’d need a mutually agreed-to plan that spelled it all out sans entrails and teas leaves. I was told this was really going to throw sand in the “plan” gears. A size? Sacré Bleu! How uncivilized. The dolt demands to look the gift horse in the mouth.

Finally, in July, the word went out. The IILP plan was formulated. All signatories would convene in the hallowed garden area at 1000 hrs and stake out the….15 X 20. I declined once again to sign the 28-8872 and the 90-day clock began. This began the first Ex Writ (CAVC 16-2098) Judge Barley pointed out that this required a mutual agreement  from all per §21.98(b) after I briefed them in on it. That made October 14th, 2017 Bingo Day.

We did some intense bargaining as the days wore on and finally, on that very last day about 43 minutes to Bingo, they began agreeing…to anything… to everything… I coulda asked for a winning Lotto Ticket and they would have agreed. I knicked them for a couple of years of VBM to give to friends (a $350 per year bennie) and kicked myself that I didn’t ask for a life subscription. Of course, now, in retrospect, it looks like that was mere window dressing and an elaborate dog-and-pony show of the highest calibre.

CAVC #17-1450 was a little premature. I should have given them more rope to clothesline themselves with as they did anyway. I apologize profusely to the Court for that one. I knew they were going to cheat but I didn’t have the smoking gun yet. Boy howdy did that all change as you will read about here. It’s like Arlo Guthrie said in Alex’s Alice’s Restaurant about the “city’s finest taking glorious 8 ½ X 11 glossy color photographs” of their garbage for evidence. Well sir, I submit I caught these boys with their fingers in the pot and they left themselves a passel of evidence on the trail to this Texas Necktie party.

My mentor Bob Walsh always intones the phrase “belts and suspenders” folks. Always have support for what you claim in law. Finding that perfect analogy is the only challenge. You want to find the perfect case that most closely parallels yours. What better analogy than the immortal Extraordinary Awards Procedure EAP where Director, Comp and Pen Tom Murphy was taking a chainsaw to your huge retro check behind your back. Busted.

Enjoy. Pop an IPA, get the popcorn popped and sit back for a perfect ambush story. This is more akin to the Gang Who Couldn’t Shoot Straight meets Godzilla.

EX WRIT 18- FOR FILING 2-20-18 Redact