I got the Bat signal in the sky the other day. Jerrell and John started hounding me for the sequel to our last show on December 19th. This subject has been reintroduced from strictly the Blue Water angle in the new Congress which is rather disconcerting. I reckon all of you remember the introduction of SMC T (R2) for TBI and the VA Caregiver Program to post 9/11/2001 Vets. It seems incongruous to have some Vets “more equal” than other Vets like George Orwell’s Animal Farm. Nevertheless, this is what VA is devolving into. A Blue Water Squid 35 miles offshore who never so much as smelled AO gets the presumptive but the Thailand Vet who was actually standing in it gets nothing.

The post 9/11 Vets

I represent Thailand Vets who are equally as sick as the Blue Water Boys so why the dichotomy? Tune in and find out.

Thursday 1900 Hrs on the (L)east coast and 1600 on the Left. Adjust for Middle America and fire for effect.

The call in number is still

347-237-4819 (push #1 to talk)

And for today’s entertainment,

Posted in Agent Orange, AO, Blue Water Navy, FACE HUMOR, Humor, KP Veterans, TBI, VA Agents, Vietnam War history | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment


I always appreciate when you fellow Veterans take the time to keep us up to speed on pertinent medical ailments relating to exposure to herbicides. Here, I was blessed with a recent experience of one and how he was able to adapt to the awkward, changed circumstances. That he was able to remain calm and civil and refrain from any misogynistic comments in these circumstances speaks volumes about his upbringing.

My friend requests anonymity which I understand.

I went to my regular VA doctor for my 70 year physical and was sent to the Urologist as a precaution. He seemed to be cognizant of our plight vis-a-vis AO.

When I reported to Urology, I gotta tell you I was real uncomfortable. Turns out Dr. Urologist is a very pretty female doctor. I didn’t want to turn into a bird dog and “go on point” so to speak.  The booth bitch asked me if I had a problem with that. I was polite and figured all the other guys had gone through this so I said roger that. No sweat.

I got into the backless gown and reported to Room 4.  And in she comes, Alex.

“I’m going to check your prostate today because you’re an in-country Vet. We’re seeing a lot with prostate problems in your cohort. This new procedure is a little different from what you are probably used to. It helps us better visualize the gland.  I want you to lie on your right side, bend your knees, then while I check your prostate, take a deep breath and say, ’99’.

I sucked it up and took the deep breath. When I felt the “check” begin, I slowly exhaled 99. Or tried to. It came out a bit garbled through the groan.

The doc then asked me to roll over on my left side and do the exact same thing. I did. I was really holding together there up to about that point.

I thought we were done and started to slide off the table when she pulled me up short. “Very good. Now then, I want you to lie on your back with your knees raised slightly. I need to check your prostate with this hand, and with the other hand I’m going to hold up  your penis to keep it out of the way.” Is that okay with you?”

I dumbly nodded yes and rolled over. By this time I was totally tongue-tied. Speech escaped me at that point.  In fact, it looked  like there was no way I was going to avoid the inevitable. Resigned to the worst, I assumed the position.

She did exactly what she said she was going to do and then said “Okay. Give me a biiiig deep breath and say 99, sir.” It was already too late. I just barely got the deep breath accomplished….




Posted in Agent Orange, AO, Humor, KP Veterans, VA Agents, Vietnam Disease Issues | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments


I got the call the other day that we lost another Vietnam Vet to Agent Orange. Fortunately (I guess), Dan was Brownwater Navy on the rivers and the estuaries leading down into the South China Sea. He was given Nehmer Class status without any grief from the outset for his prostate cancer. If the cancer had stopped there, he’d be alive and I wouldn’t be writing this. But it didn’t, he’s passed and I am writing this. The good news is that we got his R1 in what some would call record time for VA.

I’d like to thank the Coach over there in Fort Harrison, Montana, Jean Ketchel, for everything she did to make this possible. If we had this level of excellence at all VAROs, we’d be in mighty high cotton. I won’t say all she did but it’s enough for Sainthood in my VA book. I deal with some downright ornery folks at the VA.  Which always makes me ask them to look me in the eye and recite their little mantra ICARE- Integrity, Commitment, Advocacy, Respect, and Excellence.

Dan told me those boats would do 50 flat out and more if the engines were perfectly in sync. Imagine doing that on nine foot swells a mile out going up the coast to the DMZ. His back took a real pounding and crumped  by 1994. Then the PTSD in 96 and the prostate in 2017. When the bone cancer spread to the lower extremities, that was all she wrote. VA pretty much insisted he’d be needing to cut them off before they’d call it “loss of use”.  Well, shoot. I figured that going in. It’s the same dog and pony show every time requiring a Veterans Law Judge to say it. No self-respecting DRO wants that on his or her resume. R1 is $7,585.10 a month and in VAland, that ain’t chump change. They feel you are stealing it from them personally. Well, everyone but Jean.

Dan, wife with 67 Dodge Coronet

I find it relatively impossible to believe that the VA et al insist there are 850,000 true,        RVN,  “red clay between our toes” Vietnam Veterans when I have personally buried three in the last ten years. Dan will make #4. I don’t know about the rest of you but either I’m incredibly unlucky to know a lot of relatives and friends who attended the SEA Olympic Games or my odds of randomly running into dying Vietnam Vets are incredibly inexplicable.

Imagine this. Cupcake has a website for her real estate business here in Washington-Priority One Realty. She’s good at it and has a mess of agents. Dan and his wife came to her to do some house buying and someone mentioned Veterans. Well, that was before I was accredited. When we next heard from them, they were thinking of moving back here from Montana to be close to the kids on account of his cancer. He didn’t make it back.

We invited them over here to our hacienda for a Travel Board hearing before a Veterans Law Judge (VLJ) because they don’t do Travel Boards in Fort Harrison. Silly, huh? What? no good golf courses? French-themed restaurants? Bummer. The VLJ granted in 8 days which speaks volumes for how to read the regulations.

Nevertheless, the number of true Vietnam Veterans is static, kids. It’s been stuck at 850 K for about 12 years. By rights, it should be down to about to 800- 810,000 unless all those 55-year-old VFW bar warriors are counted in. What the hey. Let’s add in the Blue Water guys who never actually touched land and really replenish that number. How about we include all the Thailand/Laos Vets and a greater number from Korea, Anderson Island and Okinawa who actually did wear Eau d’ Orange? Shoo doggies. If we threw in all them folks, why, we’d never get a wall built down south. So I guess that answers that question, gentlemen.

Dan is representative of a dying breed literally. All of us in the fabled Nehmer class are. We have the worst luck with all manner of cancers, and organs that just go kaplooey for no reason. I’m a classic example. Stage 3 kidneys and already berthing stones. Stage 4 liver- albeit compensated both medically and financially, intestines that one day just collapsed (Crohn’s) when I was 45.  The list goes on and on. I hold up my hands every morning waiting for the pill roll.

Dan told me of getting hit by 7.62 shrapnel during a firefight up the Perfume River one night. His skipper pulled it out the next morning with a pair of needle nose pliers. Then they returned to Da Nang for a resupply. No surgery. No sick call. No Purple Heart. All in a day’s work.

Rest in Peace, Dan. I’ve got your six. I’ll be filing the DIC as soon as I get the death certificate from your wife. No charge. This one’s on me.

Posted in Agent Orange, Aid and Attendance, All about Veterans, Blue Water Navy, KP Veterans, Lawyering Up, PTSD, SC For Cause of Death, Tips and Tricks, VA Agents, VBMS Tricks, Veterans Law | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Jingle bells

My old Marine and I have spent a lot of time in medical waiting rooms this past month, reading magazines.  I took the December American Legion Magazine home with me from the free pile at the VA.  Here are a few cute jokes to share from the last page, Parting Shots.

It’s beginning to cost a lot like Christmas.

THIS HOLIDAY SEASON, in lieu of gifts, I’ve decided to give everyone my opinion.

‘TWAS THE NIGHT before Christmas, and all through the house, everyone was on their phones.

THE OFFICE CHRISTMAS PARTY, is a great opportunity to catch up with people you haven’t seen in 20 minutes.


Kiedove (guest author)

Update: Active service military in Iraq were visited by the President and First Lady today.  Regardless of how we may feel about how things are going, the Twitter video of the event is moving; the genuine pleasure on the faces of the men and women serving is precious. Watch it and feel proud to be American (again) and renewed in our efforts to support veterans and support world peace. Visits from our elected officials to war zones are so important at holidays and all year. 

Posted in Uncategorized | 2 Comments


As most of you know, I am not one to detract from other Veterans outfits-or Veterans themselves, for that matter- unless they become rude, crude, socially unattractive (or boorish) and embarrass the collective Veteran community. I have always been consoled by the belief that we are a close-knit cohort of 3% of the population and disturbed we face an inordinately uphill battle for our benefits. I have been variously castigated for any number of perceived slights to my fellow Veterans, and indeed charities or VSOs, when I call attention to their excesses.

You will find many links to other websites in this article. The reason is simple. I am not allowed to mention (or even discuss) many of the subjects therein.


As I am not allowed to disparage certain groups under threat of revocation of my ” legal agreement” (above), I will list a few news organizations below who documented my, and others’ bad behaviour. Following that, I will illuminate the reason for this blog. Every picture tells a story, don’t it?




A trickle of lawsuits turned into a positive deluge of the same. All of a sudden, their legal beagles were suing anyone who even appeared to be cutting into their pie. As most of you who are Veterans know, this simply is not done. Bad form and all. While we all may disagree on our charity du jour, we should respect their purported desire to better the plight of Veterans. My site, asknod.org, has been engaged in that endeavour for almost ten years now. Obviously, the perfect charity would be one that returns every dime collected to those it hopes to better. Apparently, that is not attainable anywhere but here. And while I am not a true 501(c)(3), or any other version, for that matter, some contribute to my causes. I merely forward the funds on to legitimate charities in their entirety. No dealer prep and destination fees with fuel surcharges here, folks.

I was rudely reminded of what was permitted and what was verboten in 2015 when I had my chain jerked for my sarcastic wit regarding one charity. I deserved it. Humor and sarcasm have their boundaries and I broached them. I have learned my lesson and no longer harass anyone in that regard as the objects of my ire were eventually replaced by more responsible fiscal stewards of the charity’s funds (and I signed an agreement to refrain from same). Hey, I didn’t call CBS. A Veteran employee of the Broadmoor Resort who might have happened to have Hepatitis C and reads my blog might have, however.

2016 dawned with a renewed push to sue even their very own ex-employees that barked at the charity…


As we know from the same news sources, what goes round comes around. The truth finally came out on CBS. Face it. You can’t go around pissing money away on things without someone taking notice. What’s sad, to me, is this gentleman didn’t have the intestinal fortitude to even write me back and apologize for the errors in his article. I would have, had the shoe been on the other foot.



The reason for this article is simple. At the time I was disparaging a certain charity, I was attacked by the severely wounded Veteran and fellow Air Force alumni. He wrote from the perspective of one intimately well-versed in the financial aspects of the charity I insulted. Be that as it may, the crux of my current ire is simple. I was accused of writing articles for Veterans Today– a marginal, right wing website who believes in underwater UFO airports, chemtrails, the Illuminati and the Jewish conspiracy to take over the world. For that, I sincerely apologize. In retrospect, I should have read some of the articles which were being published on their website. Had I performed that due diligence, I would never have published my articles there. When I discovered Veterans Today had about as much to do with Veterans as fishing has to do with sewing, I erased everything and ceased my relationship. In short, I saw the error of my ways and amended who I shared my blogs with. For the last three years, I have been circumspect to assure I don’t pull that stunt again.

About Senior Airman Kolfage

The Veteran who attacked me in 2015 was Senior Airman Brian Kolfage, a well-known Veteran in the community. The tenor of his attack and his analysis appear to reflect he had a great deal of help writing the article. The reason I say this is we- all of us- take the AFQT test to determine what we will become when we enlist. The folks who score the lowest become cooks. The next higher tier of low scoring aspirants become Military Security Policemen- military cops. Yes. In spite of several articles stating S.A. Kolfage was SF ( an abbreviation for Special Forces), in reality, Kolfage was a security policeman. I don’t mean to denigrate his intelligence or patriotic verve for serving America. There certainly is nothing wrong with being a cop in any of the branches of the military. Somebody has to do it. I merely wish to put it in perspective from an intelligence standpoint. Could be the NBC writers meant Security Forces and not Special Forces. Could be I’m also plumb disinformed and wet all over. I merely convey the content of the articles I read.


Nevertheless, the body of the article discussed in great length my “association” with Veterans Today (VT). Gordon Duff, the chief cook and bottlewasher at VT is a former Marine who claims he was a Vietnam combat Veteran. His MOS reveals he, too, was somewhat less than he purports- it would appear he flew a desk. How he managed to snag a CAR in ten days in Vietnam is beyond me. Well, that’s what his  DD 214 and other military records state. Google him. The site This Ain’t Hell (but you can see it from here) has done some amazing footwork excavating his misadventures over the years.

I really had no beef with Mr. Kolfage and even sent him an email asking him to discuss my charity findings. I was concerned that he might not have the back story. I received nothing in reply. Check this out… The below are quotes from Mr. Kolfage’s ruminations about my “attacking” a certain charity:

The first is a blog called Veterans Today, and a simple search revealed they are riddled with crazy conspiracy theorist articles and anti-Semitic content. The Southern Poverty Law Center stated Veterans Today is “a website that purports to be a ‘military veterans and foreign affairs journal’ but is really a locus of the far right, is now squarely in neo-Nazi territory.” [emphasis mine]

No argument from me there, Brian.

“After reviewing all the documents, audits and endorsements from outside agencies. I can say without a doubt the Wounded Warrior Project is not a “legal scam” and is not “cooking the books” as Graham claimed on Veterans Today.”

I’d merely question whether he has a CPA degree.

Not only has [sic] my family and I participated in many of their programs, witnessed thousands of other veterans participate with their families in the programs, but the Wounded Warrior Project has easily spent around $40,000 on my family over the past few years. That’s a first-hand account of direct support to a wounded warrior. Now multiple [sic] that by tens of thousands.

I guess I don’t need to point out that it is conceivable to buy allegiance to any cause. Which is not to imply Senior Airman Kolfage was the least bit influenced by  some charity’s $40,000 “donation” to him or letting Lt. Dan buy him some most excellent digs down in Florida.  Perish the thought. I read he paid Facebook over $300,000 in folding money for ads up until Monsieur Zuckerburg 86’d him. Let that sink in. You have $300 K in disposable income for FacePlace® advertisements and folks are buying you a house? I’m going to have to put a “donations” widget on asknod. I am soooo missing out on this gig.

Several days ago, I noticed a major uptick in hits on an article I wrote in 2014 regarding VA’s treatment of my fellow airman Brian. This was a year prior to his diatribe about eeeeevil me.


Imagine my surprise as to why I might get 750 hits on that antique article in less than 5 hours. Seems there are a lot of folks suddenly interested in this gentleman. Apparently, he  set up a GoFundMe™ page to collect funding for a border wall down south. I speak of the endeavour President Trump is causing the Democrats so much heartburn over. Hey, I’m all in for a wall. It works like a champ for the Israelis trying to keep the bomb-throwing sand ranchers out of their country. Seems it did an excellent job of keeping the East Germans out of West Berlin, too. China’s endeavour in the 17th century? Not so much-but then they lacked 30,000 volts of electricity and AK 47s. With drugs, Al Quaida and God only knows what else trying to get in to the US, I don’t have a problem with it (sans the electricity and guns). If they build it, maybe the bad guys won’t try to come here. Nothing else seems to have worked so what the hey?


Kolfage Konspiracies

I was honestly ready to let bygones be bygones and pick up the check book to cut ol’ Brian some money for this. But then, another paragraph caught my eye…




Ruh-oh, Rorge. Brian’s a chemtrail sniffer? Maybe he’s just been smoking some powerful Mantanuska Thunderf**k . Of course, this is pure conjecture and not an accusation that he smokes pot. Perish that thought, too.

Interestingly, a web page called “The Independent” had this to say:

The sites [Kolfage’s] relied on using outrage and click-bait headlines—often false, racist and provocative—to increase viewership and shares. Some of the headlines include “Obnoxious Black People Lose Their Minds When Victoria Secret Models Say This 1 Word On Live Video” and “Trump Just Released Embarrassing Vids Of Obama’s Muslim Friends That He Never Wanted Seen.”

Say it ain’t so, Bro.The irony is absolutely delicious. Here’s some horribly disabled Veteran (like myself), apparently aspiring to be an author, writing articles for his numerous far-right websites discussing how Hillary had a terminal illness during her Presidential run and a bunch of other blogs with similar dire tales of Kolfage Konspiracies™ about Lord knows what. And he had the balls to go after me for mistakenly publishing an article in a far right rag (which was later inadvertently verified by a major news media outfit). I submit that is the epitome of the pot calling the kettle black.

Hey. I have no problems with disabled Veterans who write articles about Veterans. I encourage it and freely offer an editorship here any time someone desires to pull up a soapbox. That’s what I do as a sideline in addition to legally representing them before the Veterans Administration and the Court of Veterans Appeals in their claims for compensation. I just have a few qualms when some also admit to inhaling chemtrails. I have the utmost respect for my President but I do take him with a grain of salt. Remember, I respect the Office of the Presidency but certainly do not agree with all the present occupant espouses. I doubt anyone can be “all in” with some of his ideas but that’s the beauty of America. We get to think and say what we feel- well, unless we’re in Berkeley, California, it involves former members of the Confederacy or anyone who ever owned slaves. Boy howdy is that ever going to bite Presidents Jefferson and Washington on the ass some day. Can you imagine the hue and cry when the “Recently Enlightened”demand the Jefferson Memorial be removed and Mount Vernon razed to the ground?

In this business, what you write in the past can come back to haunt you many years later. We  discover that every day.  So, if you can ferret out old articles from Right Wing News, Fight4FreeSpeech (which accepts “donations” ), VeteranAF and Freedom Daily, you may find our Mr. Kolfage is not all he’s cracked up to be. Again, this is puuuuuure conjecture because I understand ownership of these sites is vague. But then, that’s what the gentleman implied when he dropped the hammer on me. I forthrightly admit mea culpas were in order in my case, though (re a certain charity). I had my  well-deserved “Come to Jesus” moment in 2015. Que sera sera.

P.S. With all due respect for that certain charity I am precluded from discussing above, I am ecstatically happy to see it appears they have reformed their earlier financial peccadilloes and are now somewhat more transparent. But then I would not know about that because I do not follow their day-to-day work for Veterans and am not a Certified Public Accountant.

And that’s all I’m going to say about that.

A warm Merry Christmas to you all. Bury your prejudices and abstain from addressing recriminations from far right nut jobs. Fund the wall personally if you see fit. Just be sure there isn’t a siphon hose attached to that GoFundMe Build the Wall site. I’m certainly not implying there is but sometimes history repeats itself.

Posted in Approved Veterans Charities, Humor, Inspirational Veterans, KP Veterans | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments


Boy howdy you can sure tell this radio show is going to be a daisy. As most know, Procopio v Shinseki has finally metamorphosed into Procopio v Wilkie at the Fed. Circus. Oral yelling matches were held last week and the collective VA legal world holds its breath. Well, everyone but me. I’m putting my money on the bobtailed nag called Wilkie. Don’t get me wrong. It’s a longer story than most of you have been told. The fact that the U.S. Senate is getting cold feet on inviting the So. China Sea G&CC folks into the fold is alarming enough but the Procopio imbroglio is running neck and neck with it.

Let’s take a gander in the crystal ball of the CAVC and take a gander at Mr. Al Procopio. I’ve written a few paragraphs on this fellow I want you all to read. Here’s the first blog.


Here was the second one about a three years later:


I like this most recent one from his attorney John B. Wells at the  BVA…

Procopio III at the Board

The Veteran maintains that he was exposed to herbicides aboard the USS INTREPID. He served on that ship from January 1965 to May 1967 (11/9/06 VBMS Military Personnel Record, p. 7). However, the USS INTREPID was an aircraft carrier, from which A-1 Skyraiders used for bombing and rocketing targets were launched (10/5/09 VBMS Web/HTML Documents). There is no evidence of any aircraft spraying Agent Orange or that tactical herbicides were kept on the USS INTREPID, or launched from it.

But wait…

The attorney additionally argued that mail went to the Fleet Post Office in Da Nang that served ships in Dixie and Yankee stations.  The mail was received by flights in which persons when ashore. The ship’s laundry was contaminated from the pilots’ and others’ clothing.  Mail bags sat on runways that were another source of contamination.  The attorney knew of no scientific studies that
showed that Agent Orange adhered to paper but argued it adhered like a fingerprint.

In addition…

The attorney also argued in October 2016 that persons coming aboard from the landmass of Vietnam would bring the dioxin aboard on their shoes, uniforms and exposed skin. They showered in a common shower and their clothing was washed in a common laundry. The oily film from the dioxin/petroleum mixture as well as the epithelial cells would adhere to horizontal surfaces in the shower.

You see where we’re going with this argument? Right. Could’ve, would’ve and should’ve ran fourth, fifth and sixth at Golden Gardens last week. If you are going to throw out internet articles and hypothetical theories, you shouldn’t be surprised if that dog won’t hunt.

While I have the utmost respect for Mr. Wells as an attorney, I can only say that you win with evidence, not hypotheses. Moreover, if all these far-fetched possibilities were even conceivable, then what does that say for all of us who served in Thailand…on the ground… where the Government belatedly has admitted it DID spray “tactical herbicides”… on the ground we walked on. Boy howdy did that get all over our boots, our showers and the care packages from home.

I wrote the below article a while back about kids up in Laos where more AO, A Pink and A Purple were sprayed early on. It’s obvious this is a heavy metal because it’s settled into the rice paddies permanently and continues to pollute the ground. If it all washed out to sea, why did they just dig up Da Nang and treat the soil ? Hellooooooo? Agent Orange dispersed 35 miles out to sea at the most perfect depth of 40 feet?


Take an eye dropper of FD&C #2 red food coloring and dump it into an olympic-sized pool. Show me the water turned color. Likewise, dump twenty 12-yd. dump trucks chock full of red food coloring at every riverine outfall into the So. China Sea… which is inextricably intertwined with the Pacific Ocean. Sorry Mr. Wells. More lipstick on the pig is in order.

And that’s what we’ll be discussing tomorrow afternoon at 1600 Hours on the Left Coast or 1900 Hours on the (L)east Coast.

The call in number is still

347-237-4819 (push #1 to talk)

Dial “1” (one) to talk to us. How’s that picture above for misogyny, folks? I’m hopeless.

P.S. SquareBob Lawpants sent me this one from the Atlanta Airport. Braille?

Cupcake found this one.

And from Dennis…

Posted in Agent Orange, All about Veterans, Blue Water Navy, CAVC ruling, DM II, Independent Medical Opinions, Inspirational Veterans, KP Veterans, Medical News, Thailand AO presumptive path, VA Agents, VA Attorneys, VA Conspiracies, VA Medical Mysteries Explained, Veterans Law, Vietnam Disease Issues, Vietnam War history | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment


I get a lot of pictures, cartoons and dynamite humor I’d love to print if it weren’t for that pesky bunch of people who think my brand of humor is “off”. Hey, folks, it isn’t my humor. You who visit this site send it to me. I merely cull it for the finest or most offensive and duly share it. I do understand we’re all supposed to operate under a new metric and remove all the Confederate flags and statues of valiant folks like General J.E.B. Stuart. I see they had to change the name of the Junior High School my sister attended in Falls Church in the fifties. Jez Louise. It took them sixty years to decide General Stuart was “offensive”? I guess I shouldn’t put a bee in anyone’s bonnet and mention President Thomas Jefferson had a shit ton of slaves and even had some kids with them. I figure that will only hasten the eventual dismantlement of the Jefferson Memorial. 

Unless no one noticed, at the end of the War of Northern Aggression, President Lincoln awarded war pensions to both the Northern and Southern soldiers (and Generals) who were disabled. Face it. Eventually some progressive jackwad is going to go back in the Bible and discover Abraham had six wives. Shit, oh dear. They’ll declare the Bible to be pornography. Where does it end? I was tarred and feathered and declared a mysoginist for even suggesting Justice Kavanaugh be accorded due process re the accusations (all discovered unfounded) of running rape rooms at summer parties.

asknod will continue to be one of the last bastions of political incorrectness and rightly be proud of it. I was born south of the Mason Dixon line and revel in it. My memories will remain flush with the romantic Confederate notions I cherish from my childhood there. If being a born Southerner automatically categorizes me as some kind of alleged White Nationalist, then fly at it. And no. I don’t own any slaves nor did any of my ancestors.

Nevertheless, only in the south will you find a womens’ beauty shop which also specializes in Taxidermy and guns. Just outside of Dothan, if it’s still there, was the proud sign we spotted in 1991 announcing their business

“Hair Styling and taxidermy”. Under it was an added sign boldly offering “Guns-Rent to Own.” Only in the South, folks. Which brings me to why I called you here today. I have amassed a new cache of humor and wish to poison your minds with it.

Only in the South

Next door to a denture clinic in Goldsboro, NC


Outside Branson Missouri, the birth of the Weber window mount. I’m guessing this old boy got the idea from an A&W Rootbeer stand or a drive in movie place…

The original birthplace of the Arkansas Slip ‘N Slide…

What? Retired in Jackson, Mississippi, sold the backhoe and still have your Fifth Wheel low boy?  Why not a Mobile Home port-a-deck, dude?

Get tired of freezing your reproductive organs off in winter when fishing in West Virginia? Cut up that old Ford Econoline and fit it to your Glassply. Now you’re talking. Folks will know you are cruisin’ in style.

Need to camouflage those dead tires in Savannah the old lady told you to move back before Easter? Make it a Les Schwab Christmas, dude…

TKO in the Monte Carlo and the rear end is still viable? Why not save it and make it an Orlando Chevy Kodak moment?

This sign epitomizes the mentality below the Mason Dixon line, folks.



And not to  be outdone by all that, here are the asknod Kentucky chapter contributions

And because I know I forgot to irritate someone somewhere, I’ll include something to inflame you too. I found this one relatively harmless…

Merry Christmas to you all- Black, white, yellow and all 46 sexes. I like the one in Austria where a guy filed in Court to have his age reduced on government documents from 64 down to 49. Well Hell. If you can change sexes and marry your boa constrictor, why not choose your age? You are as young as you feel, right?



Posted in Humor, KP Veterans, VA Agents | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments