Lonestar belt buckles and old faded Levis… and each night begins a new day. And here we are at the Big House. It’s been a long journey from 2008 to 2020. Learn, learn and learn. And I had to go back to school and learn how to write a true, acceptable legal brief. They probably teach all that in law school but I traded it for a fun-filled two- year all expenses paid vacation in sunny Southeast Asia. I have always fought and won below at the BVA. The chances of winning 3/4 to a million at the Agency level are somewhere between ‘never going to happen’ and ‘when you’re dead’.
I kinda figured this was going to happen so I started preparing and got admitted to the Court back in 2018. I didn’t realize the BVA was going to drag their feet so long and try to come up with a really good post hoc rationalization to explain why Butch missed it by thaaaaaaaaat much. Considering the mortar round hit about two feet away from him, it’s a miracle he isn’t in a Heavenly Zip Code. We hope to improve his luck soon.
The BVA isn’t as picky on how you present an appeal. Lay it out. Facts. What happened. What should have happened. What didn’t. Gimme the money, honey and be quick about it. Right? As for the VAROs, they don’t even read it until you get to the DRO zone. But, now that I know, I guess I could start writing them all like this. My former neighbors but still my friends, fellow warrior and clients all these years, Butch (and Barb) are now at the beginning dance before the “trial” and the verdict. Next up, the Court has the Rule 33 Conference scheduled for May 19th at 1030 Hrs Local PDT. I have to provide a Rule 33 Conference submission to the Court’s chosen Central Legal Staff person who acts as a possible mediator and Secretary Wilkie in the person of Melissa Timbers, Esq. 027 OGC. In the briefing notes, I have to mention why Butch is right and why we believe the Secretary has been smoking too much Mantanuska Funderthuck, to put it politely. Every comma has to be perfect. Every cite has to be right. Every RBA has to be accurate. Or it all comes crashing down and you have to fix it. Time out. Delay. You look bad… like an amateur.
By law and Court rules, I get 60 days from February 28th -the receipt of the “claims file”- to submit my Appellant’s brief. I accomplished it a week early but spent the last month doing it. My mentor, Robert P. Walsh, Esq., yet another distinguished Vietnam Veteran, has been my North Star. VA can blame the damage I’ve done all on him. He taught me and now I’m loose like Pandora or the Fates and running amok. Very few of you know Bob is an 11 Bravo- admittedly Birdshit (Airborne) from the 173rd. He even has a CIB so he’s the real McCoy. There are damn few of us who do this who have walked in those green boots. I hope I do honor to us and don’t screw it up. Talk about Busting your Maiden on a claim like this…
Sit down. Get a beer or better a good single malt on a couple of rocks and start on page one. If you’re a law dog, you probable begin on i. I only have one client who’s a lawyer so Lori may offer me some positive feedback. Cupcake and Buckwheat Junior, J.D. already gave me a boatload, too-on what to leave out. And of course, Pickles who demanded I take her out for play breaks and the call of nature. A Law dog literally.
THE CORONA BRIEFING
If the Corona bug had to choose a time to appear, it picked the perfect one for me. Not that I welcome it but it relieved me of having to go to Spring NOVA in Atlanta right in the middle of my first opus. During this time, everyone of you readers seem to be sitting at home and scraping the internet for humor to keep yourselves amused. My mailbox doth positively runneth over. I attach a few of the best and save the rest for later.
At LZ Grambo, Cupcake has been working with the horses on how to wear their masks properly and practice social distancing. Here’s Day one at lunchtime. Cooper is a Thoroughbred which explains why he was socially correct. The mask thing needs a lot of work. They don’t get it.
The perfect Quarantini:
6 shots (3/4 cup) Pomegranate juice
3 shots Citroen Vodka
1.5 shots Cointreau liqueur
Shaken, not stirred. Chill the glasses.
Next, from LRRP Ed, I got the inside scoop on where this virus started. A bit racist but not over the top because I don’t think this is real. No one, blonde or not, could dial this one up.
Next, a Swedish beer commercial. Hey, I don’t shop for these. They arrive unsolicited. It’s still g rated so I’ll allow it.
And last, practicing social correctness and sneezing properly into the upper arm to avoid spreading germs. I think this flick is from Kyrgyzstan.
I do hope all of you are staying safe and lack for nothing. These are rough times for some and are not going to get better for a while. Learn to share. Help others. Keep smiling. God isn’t pissed at us. At least I’m pretty sure He isn’t. Anybody stupid enough to eat bats was bound to come down with something like this.