Today’s winner:
Second Place:
Presneeze (presn
z) noun.
That awkward moment with eyes closed before you cut loose with the physical exhalation. synonym prechoo! (verb)
I got this from a fellow Vet who is aware of my summer vacation in the Land of the Hmong in 1970. It strikes home as all who served there knew we were in Indian country. With no laws and the Geneva Convention Protocols a sham, if you were captured it was akin to Mission: Impossible-If you are captured, your government will disavow any knowledge of you or your actions. We wore civilian attire and carried Laotian driver’s licences. Some had USAID ID. Others who worked for Air America and wore the uniform had a modus vivendi with the Pathet Lao and could be “bought” back. Not so for American soldiers and airmen.
The movie is about John Robertson, a Special Forces trooper doing what we all did-sightseeing. He had his chopper shot out from under him and that was all she wrote. I strongly suspect he succumbed to the effects of extensive interrogation and brainwashing. No one of sane mind would opt to stay of his own free will.
P.S. Now with all that said, I received this from several knowledgeable individuals:
Some info indicates the man is a fraud. The missionary named Tom Faunce, has been involved in raising funds from other POW families. It is what it is…I sure don’t know the truth.
http://lcweb2.loc.gov/frd/pwmia/S134_4/2.pdf
http://www.macvsog.cc/john_hartly_rob.htm
http://www.fakewarriors.org/phonies/phonies486.htm
http://vietnam-wall.myarmedforces.com/profile/44354/John_Robertson#
http://www.powhrdlicka.com/downloads/2009LiveSightings.pdf
In 2008, Mr. Ngoc was taken to the U.S. Embassy in Phnom Penh (Cambodia) to check for fingerprints. Vân tay của ông Ngọc được gửi về Mỹ để kiểm tra và ngày 13/2/2009, Cục điều tra Liên bang Mỹ (FBI) kết luận vân tay của ông Ngọc không khớp với vân tay chính thức của cựu binh Robertson. His fingerprints were sent to the U.S. to Jade checks and on 02.13.2009, the U.S. Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI) concluded his fingerprints did not match the fingerprint Jade’s official veterans Robertson.
According to reports from families of men who are missing in Vietnam, there is an individual or small group of individuals contacting, POW/MIA family members, activist and individuals within the Vietnamese community. Their story is always the same; they have access to one or more POWs and they can get them home.
Money isn’t mentioned at first. These unscrupulous individuals first
establish a rapport with their intended victim. They provide small
pieces of information, all readily available through public documents,
or gleaned from conversations with the family member over a period of
time. Then they provide photos. Most of the recent reporting centers
on John Hartley Robertson lost in Vietnam on May 20th 1968. In some
cases when a family member is contacted they will be told their loved
one is held with Robertson, thus making it very personal.
Since last June, at least 8 individuals have been approached to help
“rescue” John Hartley Robertson. At least two individuals provided
funds to assist in the “rescue.”
Rarely, just rarely, mind you, can you put one over on me. You have to be slick and svelte. It helps if you’re one of my immediate family where the trust is implicit.
As most know. April Fool’s Day is my birthday and it is my signature event of the year. A good joke will be your reward for just waking up on the 1st. To have the tables turned on me is simply unheralded in my memory and certainly not in my lexicon. So I was nonplussed to be greeted by my daughter this morning who came over “because she loves me and wanted to visit”.
I have April Fooled everyone in my family to death over the last 25 or 30 years. My daughter (Princess) felt the need for a little comeuppance. I tell all that I do not believe in conspiracies. I stand corrected. She found a large, plastic melon which was extremely realistic and smuggled it into my winter broccoli which never materialized until Spring. On April Fool’s day, of course. Being paralyzed from the neck up, as most men my age, I blithely marched past it during my rounds in the garden for a week. The phone rang off the hook with calls from Heidi to Cupcake all week long. Nivan, one of Cupcake’s real estate agents came over and tried to lead me into it on the magic day but I was too preoccupied.
“So show me your purple broccoli, Buckwheat.” she cajoled. I walked out onto the deck with her and pointed down to the food patch.
“Over yonder. See all the purple?” And with that, I did an about face and left her standing there for my appointment with the American Red Cross for my phlebotomy.
When I found it a week later, I thought it was one of my grandson’s play balls. Next, I was convinced it had grown there under glass all winter and had somehow dehydrated over time. It only weighed about 8 ounces-surprisingly light. By rights, it would have rotted but sometimes the brain overwhelms Occam’s Razor and you theorize endlessly on how it came to pass. Keep in mind, finding it a week after April Fool’s Day completely disconnected the two events or I might have caught on. I didn’t. It was an extremely good caricature considering it was plastic.
When I came in with it, Cupcake was all atwitter and helped to theorize on how it had come to pass. After several minutes she disappeared into the pantry and it sounded as though she had swallowed her tongue. She insisted something “had gone down the wrong pipe.”
A week later and Nivan showed up again. Considering I only see Nivan about once a month, this was history in the making. She, too, was intrigued about the mystery melon, asked to opine and weighed it in her hand and her mind. Each time this happened they would give each other a curious look. Once again, Cupcake scurried into the pantry and the muffled sounds of retching, or what seemed like it, began again. Since I had Vets to help, I headed for the Nodroom and the computer. Within five seconds there were gales- nay, thunderstorms of laughter coming from the kitchen. With my poor hearing, I decided not to investigate. Usually I get the “It’s a real estate joke. You wouldn’t get it.”
Another agent (Deb) came over yesterday-now a full 26 days after the day of jesters and Fool’s- and I shared the mystery with her. She did everything in her power to keep a straight face from what I was told today. She never bites her lip and she did it constantly. Again, as I left through the sliding glass door to go out to the garden, another gully washer of laughter and choking sounds ushered me out. Enough of women. I had cucumbers to grow.
Today, Princess showed up and they all congregated in the kitchen talking about one thing and another. Finally Heidi picked up the melon and asked if I had read the writing on the bottom. Of course I hadn’t. There was none. Melons don’t have writing on them.
To give you an idea of the width and breadth this despicable joke traveled, My daughter went down to California to visit her best friend and texted Cupcake daily to find out if I had figured it out. No only did it become interstate humor, one of our good friends is traveling in Romania and has been getting international updates texted to her daily. I’m sure Mirolena will be overjoyed to know the jig is up.
So with humor for all and malice toward none, my little Princess hornswoggled me at my own game- for 27 days no less. Conspiracies were hatched. Updates were issued daily to Europe and California. I am humbled beyond words. I am also blessed with a year to come up with a suitable rejoinder.
Now, in all fairness to me, due to the extended exposure in the soil prior to discovery, the writing on the bottom had become almost invisible. The Princess’ visit was to “re-ink” it so I could see it. Otherwise, I was prepared to cut into it and get the seeds out for Spring planting. I was spared that indignity. Thank goodness there are only 30 days in April.
In an attempt to stem their expected losses following the revelations of exorbitant CEO pay, the Big Six VSOs announced plans today to institute a temporary surcharge on Vets for helping them with their VA claims.
James Robert “Jimbob” Sniffalot, who drew the short straw, was trotted out to do the press release yesterday in the bar at the VFW headquarters in DC. Nursing a Jack and Coke, he bemoaned the mainstream media attack on Veterans Service Organizations and their devoted employees.
“In light of the Sequestration and the expected drop in donations and membership, it is with heavy heart that we announce the need to institute a means test on all Veterans and begin charging a small pittance for representing them before the Veterans Administration. This miniscule fee, amounting to no more than 20% of a Veteran’s award, will be collected following his grant. We do not see a need for a higher percentage because we’ve agreed to suck it in and go lean. We feel the pain of our Vets and we commiserate with them but we simply cannot sustain our losses at this time. With the advent of the Sequestration, funds available to us from Congress are slated to dry up.” said Sniffalot.
When queried about this more closely, Sniffalot admitted Congress was not cutting them short but intimated that “they might and we simply have to consider that possibility”. When pushed for some type of corroboration for his comments, Sniffalot was vociferous about the possibility of forged IRS Form 990s that have appeared recently. ” We have enemies in this business. The lawyers who represent Vets have it in for us. They’re the ones behind this. They’re greedy and want more than the 20% they gouge now” We’re simply mirroring the industry standard at 20%.”
It appears with the recent reports of extravagant pay and vacations on the Riviera for “Veterans Affairs Conferences” that most or all of the Big Six will hunker down and deny the IRS Form 990s released in the last few weeks are wholly representative of their CEOs’ pay. The American Legion went so far as to release the new location of their 2013 extravaganza as Peoria, Iowa rather than their original choice of Kapalua on Maui citing the economy as a reason. “We are just want to spend our member’s dollars in America rather than take them to the overseas” said AmLeg spokesperson Amanda Chursprudethsha. When it was pointed out that Kapalua and indeed Maui were American possessions, Ms. Chursprudethsha was taken aback. “Did this occur recently?We don’t get out much here in the New Delhi.” When it was pointed out that Peoria was actually in Illinois rather than Iowa, Miss Chursprudthsha was at a further loss for words exclaiming “We just release what the Legion has given for us. It is very possible Illinois is in Peoria.”
I’m worried to death. My attorney just read about the VSO hierarchy’ extravagant wages. He informed me he is angry that he did NOT make $400,000.00 last year nor was he so blessed in 2011. Actually, Bob’s rather in the hole somewhat due to the intransigence of fighting City Hall for his EAJA fees and Vets who sometimes think they are free to skate on his bill.
What terrifies me is that he may wait until the eleventh hour or later and up the ante. Roger that. I know. He is limited to 20% of the Wishwampum. Apparently many of you are unacquainted with the nefarious ways of these evil money grubbers. They have been known to write subcontracts indenturing you and your loved ones to manual labor. Last year, in order to induce him into taking my claim, I was forced to toil in the fields and give him 20% of my strawberry and raspberry production. I was even dunned for the dry ice and overnight shipping back to Michigan. With my firstborn male child poised to graduate from Gonzaga Law School next summer, I can see the writing on the wall. But let us put the jokes aside and discuss something far more pressing.
In regards to VSOs’ recent collective disdain for law dogs on Capitol Hill, consider this. I listened to a former VA employee, now a VSO, discuss just how horrific rainmakers are. All the usual diatribes about how they try to make it a life project so they can live off the EAJA funds were mentioned. Were you to swallow this, you would rationalize a law dog could live high on the EAJA hog and drive a Lexus This advice was tempered by how benign and “free” VSOs were. The implication was a VSO would guard your six whereas a slippery attorney looked at you like a cash cow. The disdain he felt for attorneys was palpable.
What Veterans seem to overlook is that they are dealing with rank amateurs who, as often as not, trade away your claims like baseball cards with the RVSRs or DROs. Veterans lawyers would not even dream of overstepping that client/ attorney relationship. Yet it is not unique to discover a service rep. who will do it in a heartbeat and convince you of the necessity to be “flexible”. This is perhaps the make-or-break legal aspect of the relationship that separates the VSO ribbon clerks from the attorney poker players.
VSOs, and even VA , are fond of pointing out the statistical rate of wins at the BVA among VSOs versus lawyers. Viewing it myopically, one might think attorneys do not fare well there. The truth is that few are involved at this level coming fresh from the VARO. Most Veterans are loathe to cough up 20% until they have lost at both VA venues. Attorneys get the short end of the stick and are expected to spin gold out of straw.
What VSOs are not eager to discuss is their win/loss rate at the CAVC because-guess what- virtually none have law dogs in the fight there. That’s the ugly sister they keep upstairs out of sight. They have no record there. What’s more, most Veterans now have to step from one canoe into another right here in midstream. VSO’s aren’t fond of bringing up the subject of an appeal. As most know, they have the compensation tables right there at their desks and can easily compute your almost-guaranteed winnings just waiting to be claimed.
Imagine a court setup that only allowed you marginal, unskilled representation until your appeal reaches a Title I Appeals court. No more evidence may be admitted. No more lay statements to explain why you haven’t been accorded a voice. No one with a law degree within 10 miles permitted. Until you lose. A mad scramble then ensues to find a lawdog and get him briefed on the case in record time. Records Before the Agency have to be collected, dissected and forms filed. Motions for this and motions for that with deadlines. Pontius Pilate, your recent VSO, has now washed his hands of you. Most Vets are forced to scramble to NOVA or NVLSP like rats from a sinking ship. By now, your former friends have also inveigled you into joining their VSO and making generous contributions to the indigent CEO’s 401K.
The most interesting statistic now blooms. Fully 60% of all those claims by newly represented Vets with real lawyers see another day in Court-be it a remand to the BVA or the ” Go to Boardwalk”- back to the Agency of Original Jurisdiction. How do you think they do that? Fortunately for Veterans, the legal acumen of those folks fashioning the Texas Neckties for your denial is a little skinny. These new Best Faraway Friends (BFFs) you have just made at the CAVC can see through the VA’s subterfuge. A quick tug and the denial comes apart like a cheap Walmarket® sweater.
What is truly interesting is that VA knows knows this and programs it in. “Wild hare” claims by pro se Vets often founder here but some of the egregious ones get traction. The majority who are represented, however, live to either win, get their claim vacated and a new adjudication, or even reversal. You don’t get to read about these. What is also patently obvious is that this statistic (60% ) is static. It never changes. Extrapolating backwards on a grand scale, one would not be far off prognosticating that perhaps 60% of all decisions emanating from Veterans Service Center “fast claims outlets” are equally in error. Were you to set aside all the futile Extraordinary Writs that pro se Vets file, the statistic jumps even higher. Add in the fact that the Office of General Counsel often relents at the eleventh hour and advocates removing it before adjudication and the percentage takes another jump.
Sadly, we will never know that 60% statistic is truly valid unless and until the 80 % of claimants who walk away empty handed decide to stand and fight. Should they choose to appeal, the VA backlog is going to metastasize like a runaway cancer. 2015 will become a pipedream. The BVA would have to hire another 60 Veterans Law Judges-strike that- 1600 to even stay abreast. As for the CAVC, they might have to fill that one last slot they’ve been holding for a political payback to some Senator’s son. That and recall all the old retired ones-Alzheimer’s or not.
Were I Chinese and someone of renown, I would declare 2013 the Year of the Veteran. More has been said, focused on, and discussed regarding us in the period of a few short months in 2013 that shines a glaring spotlight on the disparity of what is being done for us and indeed , what VA insists is being done. The whole concept of VA ex parte justice is nothing more than Kangaroo Kourt justice. When Vets recognize this, there may be a riot that will make the Bonus Army‘s shenanigans look like child’s play.
We ostracize the VA hierarchy for handing out bonuses and partying hearty in Orlando. We dress down the VA for the whole imbroglio of the backlog and its interminable delays. We laud the VSOs who wave the flag and fight for our rights in Congress. Or do they?
I was apprised of a website by one of our eagle-eyed members (anyone can be a member) about the VSOs haranguing the House Vets committee to hold the line on remuneration to lawyers. They really wanted to advocate for going back to the $10 limit established after the Civil War but they knew that wouldn’t fly. Instead, they merely put up a fuss. It appears they have ulterior motives. Several years ago I set out to find out the truth about the collusion or funding quirks that were mentioned. It was obvious that every one of the Big Six (DAV, PVA, VFW. AMLeg, MOPH and VVA) were getting free room and board at VAROs and VAMCs throughout America. What I wanted to know was who paid the freight on the wages of John Q. Service officer. I knew what the entry level wage was ($39 K) and what a supervisor with over 40 hours of 38 CFR training or ten years (whichever came first) was ( $47K). What I didn’t know was what the big cheeses in DC were pulling down. Many of them refuse remuneration. Sadly, not all.
I also always knew that the government reimbursed all the VSOs for each Power of Attorney they turned in. Many a service officer denied this but I finally squeezed it out of the Office of Veteran Affairs here in Washington. We are one of the few states with no independent State Veterans Representative outfit so they see no reason to hide it. You have to use one of the big six or search for one of the 44 other off-brand VSOs such as the Air Force Sergeants Association or the Red Cross. The lady informed me in no uncertain terms that yes, contrary to what was said, it was an unheralded fact that Veterans Service Organizations pulled in a pretty good income off this.
When combined with the dues and donations they generate, the numbers become staggering. This is where it gets disgusting. The Facebook Page “Gulf War Veterans” has revealed just how revolting these outfits are. Now, go back and remember above that they were railing against lawyers making too much dough off Vets who file claims. This was and is a blatant attempt to get more business by making remuneration so paltry as to drive lawyers out of the trade. VSOs are not lawyers. They have none on their staffs locally. They are lower than Leaglezoom.org. in the law business. They don’t charge anything which is good because you sure can’t sue them. You would think altruism drove this kindred feeling towards Vets. You would be horribly wrong.
Several months ago I wrote an article about all the Vet’s org.s who served for free which reveals a lot. The author of the info I reprinted erroneously stated that you could not retain an attorney until defeat at the BVA. That has changed now. You can lawyer up as soon as you get the necktie party at your local “Veterans Service Center”. VSOs weren’t too enchanted when that one was enacted either. Another article I read on this sordid subject was what piqued my interest when John showed up with this. If you have Valium 20mg. , take one. If you only have the blue tens, take two. Wait for it to kick in and then scroll down and be prepared for nausea.
How much would you expect the National Head of the DAV to accept above travel expenses for this rare privilege? 0$? That’s what I expected. How sacred a gift to help your fellow patriot. I guess I could see even $85 K with some medical/dental thrown in if they weren’t well-heeled. Here’s the breakdown of the top of each for all those hardworking, single malt swilling honchos who advocate for you and me. Oh, and to put it in perspective, remember VASEC Eric Shinseki gets $200 K a year. He also gets a limo, a driver and the rest of the medical/dental package.
Tanqueray ain’t cheap inside the beltway, hoss. Now, remember that’s just the head banana. Look at the rest of the wages and you’ll be a little leery about their next donation drive with the address labels. Their overhead must be zilch. Here’s the email uncensored.
| Name of Key Individual | Total Compensation |
| DAV | 2011 Form 990 |
| Arthur Wilson | $353,519 |
| Barry Jesinoski | $346,450 |
| Christopher Clay | $325,890 |
| J. Marc Burgess | $263,185 |
| Anita Blum | $254,726 |
| Joseph Violante | $250,520 |
| Garry Augustine | $240,358 |
| David Gorman | $208,130 |
| William Saunders | $160,458 |
| Total | $2,403,236 |
| VFW | 2010 Form 990 |
| Lawrence Maher | $238,513 |
| Robert Wallace | $223,410 |
| Allen Kent | $219,142 |
| Robert Greene | $197,028 |
| John McNeill | $171,980 |
| Richard Eubank | $163,679 |
| Richard Denoyer | $149,741 |
| Richard Kolb | $146,664 |
| Thomas Tradewell | $146,269 |
| Total | $1,656,426 |
| American Legion | 2011 Form 990 |
| Daniel Wheeler | $232,177 |
| William Justis | $163,871 |
| Peter Gaytan | $151,735 |
| Philip Onderdon | $151,183 |
| Jeffrey Brown | $149,991 |
| Patsy Waltz | $138,341 |
| John Querfeld | $109,513 |
| George Buskirk | $77,291 |
| Jimmie Foster | $68,726 |
| Total | $1,242,828 |
Apparently I have been neglecting my charges. When one agrees to give birth to life, one accepts the concomitant duty to succor and protect. I have been remiss with my tomato charges. Today will be one of atonement. I will repot, replant and apologize profusely to them.
Sometimes I sing to them but the dogs tend to howl. I’ve noticed they (both the dogs and the plants) do better when I just hum.