Just a quick update on Leigh’s Silver Queen corn. It’s over my head now. Tassels are out. I checked the radiation count and it’s down to a dull roar. My new helmet detector picks up in HD. That’s why my helmet is equipped with two dishes instead of one.
Ever since the aliens put their bases in at the North and South Poles, the weather has been changing. Duh. Everyone thinks its from chemtrails but it isn’t. The voices in my helmet told me the truth. For just $39.95 a month you can find out the truth in my Newsletter. Hell, for $69.95, you can buy one of my helmets. They have fantastic bandwidth and are Bluetooth® ready. Dealer prep and destination fees extra; No warranties expressed or implied. $69.95 includes F.O.B. to lower 48 and Canada. Standard rates apply. No roaming fees. Verizon Wireless may require a one year helmet contract. All helmets come with standard one year warranty against Fukushima radiation and chemtrail residue.
But wait. What would you say if I said I could supersize that absolutely free? That right. Call now and for the next 30 minutes you can get two of these fabulous helmets for the price of one. Simply pay the extra postage and handling fees of $239. 50 and you’ll be walking the dog in style with you significant other completely protected against whatever the atmosphere’s throwing at you.