MARINE VET’S HUMOR


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I wonder if Marines have an identity crisis. I mean  which is it? Are you an inferior member of the Navy or a stand alone? Marines, as a group, are not who I’d want to get into a disagreement with after waaay too many adult beverages. Comparatively speaking, I’d far rather go up against a bunch of inebriated,  pantywaist, motion sickness-disabled Navy guys. Marine humor follows in the same vein. Tombo’s take on various subjects…

SCOTTISH WEDDING

At the Scottish wedding reception the D.J. yelled…

“Would all married men please stand next to the one person who has made your life worth living.”

The bartender was almost crushed to death.

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SEX

Condoms don’t guarantee safe sex anymore …       

A friend of mine was wearing one when he was shot by the woman’s husband.

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Poor Lance Armstrong –

I think it is just terrible and disgusting how everyone has treated Lance Armstrong, especially after what he achieved, winning 7 Tour de France races, while on drugs. When I was on drugs, I couldn’t even find my *-!-#-%-ing bike. I say we cut him some slack.

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SCAM Alert

Just got scammed out of $25. Bought Tiger Woods DVD entitled “My Favorite 18 Holes”. Turns out it’s about golf.  Absolute waste of money! Pass this on so others don’t get scammed.

Regards

Charlie Sheen

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Pregnant Prostitute:

A Doctor asks a lady of the evening, “Do you know who the father is?”  

Her jaded response: “For goodness’ sake, if you ate a can of beans would you know which one made you fart?”

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AIR FLORIDA

A prospective passenger calls to book a reservation. The agent inquires:

“And how many people will be flying with you?”

“Damn good question. You own the plane. Perhaps you could enlighten me?”

About asknod

VA claims blogger
This entry was posted in Humor and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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