This, too, from Jim of the Mekong waters.He of Swift Boat fame sends us some really choice stuff. Too bad I can’t publish all that Swift Boat humor about, well, nevermind.

A  Vet and his wife are sitting quietly in bed-she reading and he watching the 11 PM sports-when the Wife looks over at him and asks the question. You know. That question.

WIFE: “What would you do if I died? Would you get  married again?”

HUSBAND: “Definitely  not!”

WIFE: “Why not?   Don’t you like being married?”

HUSBAND: “Of course I do.”

WIFE: “Then why  wouldn’t you remarry? ”

HUSBAND: “Okay, okay, I’d get married again.”

WIFE: “You would?”  (with a hurt look)

HUSBAND: (makes audible groan)

WIFE: “Would you live  in our house?”

HUSBAND:  “Sure,it’s a great house.”

WIFE: “Would you sleep with her in our bed?”

HUSBAND: “Where else  would we sleep?”

WIFE:  “Would you let her drive my car?”

HUSBAND:”Probably, it is almost new.”

WIFE: “Would you  replace my pictures with hers?”

HUSBAND: “That would seem like the proper thing to  do.”

WIFE: “Would you  give her my jewelry?”

HUSBAND: “No, I’m sure she’d want her own.”

WIFE: “Would you take  her golfing with you?

HUSBAND: “Yes, those are always good times.”

WIFE: “Would she use my  clubs?

HUSBAND: “No,  she’s left-handed.”

WIFE: — silence —

HUSBAND:   “shit.”

This is ample proof that you should mute the TV or put the paper down in the morning and l-i-s-t-e-n to avoid this kind of occurrence. J1VO, mind you.