Misc. silliness from the around the Web.

Questions without answers

• If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren’t people from Holland called Holes?
• Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
• Why is “abbreviation” such a long word?

Puns

• I was arrested after my therapist suggested I take something for my kleptomania.
• “She was bred in old Kentucky, but she’s just a crumb up here.”
• Greengrocers earn a meager celery, come home beet and just want to read the pepper, take a leek, turnip the covers endive into bed.
• Sometimes I wake up grumpy; other times I let her sleep.

Jokes

• I just got back from a pleasure trip. I took my mother-in-law to the airport.
• My wife and I have the secret to making a marriage last. Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, a little wine, good food….. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.

Henny Youngman

• My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She’s ninety-seven now, and we don’t know where the hell she is.

Ellen DeGeneres

• What does an agnostic dyslexic insomniac do?  Stays up all night wondering if there’s a dog.

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