Finally. The Supreme Court has agreed to hear the case about the Stolen Valor Act. Readers may recall that an enterprising 43 year old named Xavier Alvarez of Claremont, California informed potential voters that he was the recipient of the CMOH in 1987. A quick check by some enterprising sleuth revealed no such thing. In fact, further investigation uncovered the fact that he’d never even served in the Marines as he claimed. This provoked a legal action by the U.S. government that culminated in the 9th Federal Circuit Court of Jokes to declare it was permissible under some tortured reasoning associated with the First Amendment. Prosecutors wisely decided to take this up to the Supremes.

Some of you may feel this is a waste of time and resources. Others are too busy playing thumb tag with their friends via their new IP4s. I suppose time marches on, seasons change and mores evolve into more “compassionate” rationalizations. When is a lie a “lie”? If it only hurts someone else? Defamation of character is an example of this. It is actionable in a court of law and celebrities regularly employ it when the Inquirer exposes some juicy peccadillo regarding their behaviour.

When a person aspires to public office or wants to create a positive persona for a position in his community, he or she regularly lists their qualifications. These are then used as a yardstick to measure their worth. Lying about your military service or your awards and medals gives you an unfair advantage over your competitors. If believed, it implies you are of superb character and a cut above Joe Blow Citizen who didn’t feel that call to arms. As you can see, this creates an unfair advantage. How the 9th Fed. Circus can come down on the side of misstruth and deception and defend it with the Bill of Rights will escape me forever. Some may say I am a dinosaur in a new world. The same ones may say I am not empathizing with Mr. Alvarez because he was abused as a child and is a member of the Hispanic minority. He is truth challenged but he has “issues” that permit this behaviour.

This is a slippery slope and the government recognizes such. What would this provoke if left standing? Jez, where would I start? I used to be Davy Jones of the Monkees, but I changed my name to achieve anonymity because the paparazzi continually make my life miserable? Did I mention I was the founder of the Mensa Society? Our President regularly consults with me privately about Veterans Affairs? Come on. If left standing, anyone can say anything about themselves, be it military or otherwise. It gives a whole new meaning to the Army’s tagline “Be all you can be”.A whole new industry will have to arise just to determine who is telling the truth about themselves. While this will help the President’s poll numbers by lowering the unemployment percentages, it forebodes a host of new ills. Truth, as an integral part of our psyche, will become subjective or simply optional.

I think I would prefer to be the dinosaur or is that apatosaur now? Did I mention that I strongly resemble Davy Jones? It’s true. People stop me on the street all the time and say “Hey. I remember you.” Why would I lie about a thing like that?